Just When I Think I Am Done

You know that problem that just never seems to go away no matter how much you try to make it right or just forget about it?

That person who continuously spreads lies about you just to hurt you because you finally decided to move on with your life and not take any more crap from them but they still find a way to hurt you. 

The feelings of emptiness and helplessness that just never leaves you alone no matter how happy you try to be. And just when you think you are finally done it strikes you again and your back to where you started. In other words you regressed to the past, not physically but in spirit and mentally.

You want to move on but that thing or person keeps dragging you back into despair or in other words their level. Yes, I've been there too and possibly still am. The truth is the problem doesn't seem to go away no matter how much you try but it's how you deal with it that helps you move on at least in your mind.

"I'm proud of my heart. It's been played, Stabbed, Cheated, Burned and broken, but somehow Still works."

First of all you must face your problem or fear:

If it's a certain person making your life hell, then be courteous to them even if you can't stand them. Kindness kills all evil and it's the best revenge. Trust me nothing hurts your enemy more than seeing you happy. Showing them that what they are doing doesn't hurt you anymore and you won't put up with it, but that you forgive them anyway, is key to getting rid of some feelings of helplessness.

If it's a problem or fear then face it and if you can't fix it then just accept it and move on to what you can fix which is yourself. Work on things you can change about yourself that can prevent or create future problems or at least how you react to them. We can't always control what happens to us but we can control how we deal with problems and how we manage them.

Find Comfort in things that make you Happy

It might be hard to find time for yourself but it is key in being emotionally healthy. My happiness contributors = God, family, songwriting, poetry, music, school…, etc. There will be times though that I need a break from school and even family due to my busy schedule s that's where poetry and songwriting comes into the picture. 

I don't always have time for people because I put my family first but I have to find time for poetry or songwriting once in a while because its part of who I am. If you stop being yourself then who are you? Now I can say that I don't always publish my poetry or songs online. Most of my work is for my own personal gratification or humorous delectation (Yes I like laughing at myself through music&poetry..lol). I don't always feel that people will understand my words and they might judge me but when I create them they live forever in  my paper. 

If coffee is you're thing, then by all means take a coffee break once in a while. If your life schedule is overbooked, then try to reduce the things that can wait or are not that important. Taking some time for yourself is how you discover who you are as a person so that you can share your true inner beauty with others. If you don't find time to make yourself happy, then you will be a very stressed and angry person and that will only make others around you unhappy too. (lol)

Surround yourself with positive people or Family

It's always good to surround yourself with people who know you well and know your story since they will understand more than anything what you've been through. Other people will just assume they know you but they don't. Nevertheless be open to welcome new people in your life that want to be a part of your life. 

Keep your circle small as even some friends or family members pretend to care about you when they are secretly planning on stabbing you in the back. Nevertheless don't assume everyone is out to get you, just know how to tell the difference between people who really have your best interest at heart or who are only interested in breaking your heart.

People who are constantly criticizing what you do might not have your best interest at heart. A true friend listens and offers advice or constructive criticism but doesn't judge you maliciously. Surrounding yourself with people who seem to genuinely care about you and make you feel good is key in overcoming certain problems or issues but don't confuse constructive criticism with malicious criticism. 

Most people do have your best interest at heart and might not have the best words of comfort but it doesn't mean they don't care about you. They might not even know that their words hurt you, just let them know how you feel and talk about it before it turns into another problem in your life that can be avoided.

Use your feelings of emptiness/despair towards your talent or Hobby

Find out what your good at or if you already have a hobby or passion, use your feelings to create something amazing with it. It doesn't have to be to showcase it to anyone or to become well known but it will give you a sense of pride and joy knowing you created something beautiful out of your despair. 

When you're going through something unpleasant and you use it towards something that is your passion, it can actually produce some amazing internal feelings. I know that whenever I'm going through something I pick up my pen and start songwriting or write a poem that I immediately get a rush throughout my whole body. I know it's weird but it's the way that I deal with issues in my life and I believe it's the most healthy natural way to prevent depression but that's just my opinion. 

So whatever it is your good at or you love to do, use your anger, frustration, passion or whatever and release it into your talent and create something amazing. If you're an artist then your painting will be 1000 times more amazing if you PUT YOUR HEART into it.

Keep Moving: Don't Give Up

No matter what happens in your life, remember to never give up and keep looking forward. The more we focus on the past, the more we get dragged by it making it harder to move on. Like I said before the problem and that person might not ever go away but it's how we deal with it that makes a difference in how our emotional state will be. I can't say I have mastered this just yet because I still deal with these issues but I am a different person now than I was before. 


I have been through so much in my life and I have felt like giving up so many times but I also managed to overcome those fears by facing them and saying "no more." It's not easy to move on and demand respect. The old me would put up with being hurt for fear of change, but the new me is stronger because of what I've been through. I feel as though I'm not fully back to myself, but I am a wiser person who has evolved into who I was meant to be all along. I don't regret what I've been through as it was a test in my life that I have passed never to be repeated. 

“People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway.If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.” ― Mother Teresa